I've been really quiet about the fertility stuff the last couple of weeks. There is no particular reason other than the fact that I've been busy getting ready for school, and I just don't need to be consumed with it every waking minute. I was sad that the last treatment didn't work, but I am hopeful that this one will. God is in control. I just have to let go and let him handle it.
I am doing the same thing as last time, just at a slightly higher dosage. I am currently taking my injections, and I will go in some time next week to do the procedure. I have an appointment Sunday in Birmingham, and I will know then when we will do the procedure for sure. After that I have the horrible two-week wait. This time I will be too busy with school to notice every twinge. That's a very good thing.
Just continue to pray for good results and good progesterone levels and a positive pregnancy test. But, don't forget to pray for me and Richard. Fertility treatments are rough and keep you on an emotional roller coaster ride. We believe that our time is coming. Our baby is on its way. It's just a matter of time. We really need this procedure to work. We've maxed out our insurance and now have to pay for all drugs ourselves. It is extremely expensive. I really don't want to have to do a round without drug coverage. Plus, fundraising is not fun. You run out of things to do. However, if we have to raise more money, I guess a garage sale will be next, but don't worry, I'll be sure to pick an off weekend. We are Bama fans for sure.
No matter what, I know that nothing is impossible with God. He sees the big picture and knows the perfect time for us to have a baby. If we get pregnant this time, that will be amazing, and I am believing we will. If we don't, we will take a month off for sure and meet with our doctor to see what he would like to do next. We will continue treatments during the school year if we have to.
Pray, pray, pray! That's what we need right now. Thanks for your prayers, kind words, and support. We really appreciate the outpouring of love we've received from our friends and family.
Friday, August 9, 2013
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Negative
Well, I'm not pregnant. It's okay. After eight years of trying, that's ninety-six times that I've gotten a negative. That doesn't make it any easier. It still hurts just the same, but it makes you resilient. You bounce back faster and keep on truckin'.
I really am fine. You don't have to console me or feel sorry for me. And whatever you do, please don't give me advice. Now is not the time to tell me that I just need to relax or go on vacation or drink a glass of wine. I have heard every single piece of advice possible and have tried numerous things to get pregnant. Infertility is a medical condition. If you broke your foot, I wouldn't tell you to just relax and not stress. I'd tell you to get your butt to a doctor. I know people mean well, but you must think before you speak. All I want you to do is pray for me.
We have 2 1/2 weeks until school starts, so that gives me enough time to get another round in. Hopefully, that one will work. If it doesn't, then we will take a month off and start back after I get settled into the new school year. No matter what, we will keep on trying.
I don't understand why this keeps happening, but I know God sees the big picture. He knows the perfect time for us to get pregnant, and we will. I don't know a lot of things, but I know that nothing is impossible with God. And I know, without a doubt, that we will be parents. We have a peace about it.
Please continue to pray for all the things you prayed for last time. I responded very well to this medicine. It was one of the best responses I've had, so it's just a matter of time. My doctor doesn't want to change anything. Thanks for your prayers and support.
Sunday, July 14, 2013
Sunday Morning Appointments
Woke up bright and early this morning with a smile on my face and peace in my heart. We had an 8:15 doctor's appointment in Birmingham. Yes, fertility doctors are open seven days a week. I'm not making this stuff up. I hate missing church, but you do what you have to do. The good thing about these appointments is that there is no traffic and plenty of parking.
While everyone else was in church, we sat in a cold waiting room surrounded by very young couples nervously waiting. I play this game when I sit in the waiting room. I read everyone's body language and figure out what his/her stories are. We were definitely the oldest ones there today and the only veterans at this fertility stuff. The room was filled with kids in their early to mid-twenties. They were nervous and fidgety and unsure. They didn't know where to sign in or what to do. They were new to this, probably their first procedures. I wanted to look at them and tell them it would all be okay. They are so young and have plenty of time, but, of course, I didn't say a word. You know you're a veteran when the staff can pronounce your name correctly. That may not be the case for you, but with the name Shatisa, that says a lot.
Let me rewind a little and get you caught up. Everything I asked you to pray for in my last blog was answered. My estrogen level was perfect, my period was late, my CMV test was normal, I didn't have to buy anymore medicine, and I responded perfectly. As I told you before, I tried a less expensive round of drugs this time. We went in today to measure my follicles and make sure I responded. When you take fertility drugs, they cause you to produce more follicles. Follicles produce eggs. Some women produce lots of follicles and can produce lots of eggs. This can result in multiples, and you hear about that a lot. I'm not trying to produce massive amounts of follicles or eggs, and at my age, that's probably not going to happen anyway. Give me one good egg, and I'm set.
A mature follicle has to measure 1.8 mm. They say that the smaller ones can produce an egg, but normally your mature ones will be in the 1.8-2.0mm range. I had three follicles today, which is fine. I had two smaller follicles on one side, but I had a good mature follicle on the right side that measured 1.9 mm. I didn't produce as many follicles this time because I took a different drug. I had several follicles last year, but I still never had more than one or two mature ones. Anyway, I asked the nurse if she wanted me to finish up my remaining medicine, but she said no. She said I responded and had a mature follicle and was ready to go. All you need is one egg. Normal ovulating women produce one egg every month. I have to take my trigger shot tonight. It will cause me to ovulate in 36 hours. I will go back Tuesday morning for my IUI.
There are a few things I need you to specifically pray for. They checked my progesterone today. You want it to be around 200 for every mature follicle, so pray that I have good numbers. Pray that my IUI works Tuesday and I'm pregnant. On the 23rd they will do blood work again and check my progesterone after the IUI. Anything over 10 means that you ovulated, but they like for it to be higher on a medicated cycle. Pray for good numbers. I will go back for my pregnancy test on the 30th. My anniversary is the 31st, so that would be a great anniversary gift. Just pray, pray, pray, but most importantly, thank him and praise him for all he's done for us.
God is so good to me. He has answered all of my prayers and continues to bless me. I don't know what people do without him. I'm ready to be a mom. Call me crazy, but I know that I know that I know I am having a baby. This is my month. Nothing is impossible with God.
While everyone else was in church, we sat in a cold waiting room surrounded by very young couples nervously waiting. I play this game when I sit in the waiting room. I read everyone's body language and figure out what his/her stories are. We were definitely the oldest ones there today and the only veterans at this fertility stuff. The room was filled with kids in their early to mid-twenties. They were nervous and fidgety and unsure. They didn't know where to sign in or what to do. They were new to this, probably their first procedures. I wanted to look at them and tell them it would all be okay. They are so young and have plenty of time, but, of course, I didn't say a word. You know you're a veteran when the staff can pronounce your name correctly. That may not be the case for you, but with the name Shatisa, that says a lot.
Let me rewind a little and get you caught up. Everything I asked you to pray for in my last blog was answered. My estrogen level was perfect, my period was late, my CMV test was normal, I didn't have to buy anymore medicine, and I responded perfectly. As I told you before, I tried a less expensive round of drugs this time. We went in today to measure my follicles and make sure I responded. When you take fertility drugs, they cause you to produce more follicles. Follicles produce eggs. Some women produce lots of follicles and can produce lots of eggs. This can result in multiples, and you hear about that a lot. I'm not trying to produce massive amounts of follicles or eggs, and at my age, that's probably not going to happen anyway. Give me one good egg, and I'm set.
A mature follicle has to measure 1.8 mm. They say that the smaller ones can produce an egg, but normally your mature ones will be in the 1.8-2.0mm range. I had three follicles today, which is fine. I had two smaller follicles on one side, but I had a good mature follicle on the right side that measured 1.9 mm. I didn't produce as many follicles this time because I took a different drug. I had several follicles last year, but I still never had more than one or two mature ones. Anyway, I asked the nurse if she wanted me to finish up my remaining medicine, but she said no. She said I responded and had a mature follicle and was ready to go. All you need is one egg. Normal ovulating women produce one egg every month. I have to take my trigger shot tonight. It will cause me to ovulate in 36 hours. I will go back Tuesday morning for my IUI.
There are a few things I need you to specifically pray for. They checked my progesterone today. You want it to be around 200 for every mature follicle, so pray that I have good numbers. Pray that my IUI works Tuesday and I'm pregnant. On the 23rd they will do blood work again and check my progesterone after the IUI. Anything over 10 means that you ovulated, but they like for it to be higher on a medicated cycle. Pray for good numbers. I will go back for my pregnancy test on the 30th. My anniversary is the 31st, so that would be a great anniversary gift. Just pray, pray, pray, but most importantly, thank him and praise him for all he's done for us.
God is so good to me. He has answered all of my prayers and continues to bless me. I don't know what people do without him. I'm ready to be a mom. Call me crazy, but I know that I know that I know I am having a baby. This is my month. Nothing is impossible with God.
Saturday, July 6, 2013
Answered Prayers
Warning!!! If you get grossed out by the female reproductive system, you might not want to read this.
Just in case you didn't know, I want you to know that God answers prayers. In my last blog I asked people to pray about my CMV test results and to pray that my period would be a few days late. Well, my test results came back, and I am negative. That means we are clear to proceed, and my period was late, to the point that the doctor had to write me a prescription for something to make me start. I thought that was funny. In fact, I didn't start my period until after my test results were back. It was all perfect timing. Never think that your prayer request is too insignificant. God cares about you, and if it isn't insignificant to you, then it isn't insignificant to him.
I will start taking my medication today. I will take it for most of the next week, and then I will begin taking shots. I hate giving myself shots, but it goes with the territory. I've gotten used to it by now. Today is day three of my cycle, so days three through eleven I will be on medication. I will go back to the doctor Sunday the 14th for an ultrasound. That is part of taking these drugs. You have to be monitored constantly to make sure your ovaries aren't hyperstimulated. I will have to have my follicles measured and checked pretty regularly. This is when they will determine if I need more medication or an increased dosage.
I do have a few prayer requests for this week. First, I had blood work done Monday and Friday. My estrogen was too high Monday, so they tested it again Friday. Please pray that my estrogen is where it needs to be. Second, pray that this new medicine works really well and I won't have to increase my dosage and order more medicine. If they need to do that, I would love it if they would just give me some samples. They've done that before. It saves money. Also, please pray that the procedure works. I'm ready to have a baby. I get tired of doing these procedures, and I don't want to have to do IVF if I can help it.
For those of you who have contributed money or helped with our fundraising, I want you to know where your money has gone. So far, we've spent $1500 on this procedure. That isn't counting the other copays that we will pay or any extra medicine we may have to order. I am thankful that we didn't have to do IVF. That would've been even more money, but the fact is that ALL procedures are expensive. We are still fundraising and will continue to do so. We have one week to go on our Avon fundraiser, and we are doing another fundraiser this next week.
Thanks for your prayers and words of encouragement. I will continue to keep you posted. As always, here is the link to our fundraising site: http://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/our-journey-to-parenthood/50742.
Just in case you didn't know, I want you to know that God answers prayers. In my last blog I asked people to pray about my CMV test results and to pray that my period would be a few days late. Well, my test results came back, and I am negative. That means we are clear to proceed, and my period was late, to the point that the doctor had to write me a prescription for something to make me start. I thought that was funny. In fact, I didn't start my period until after my test results were back. It was all perfect timing. Never think that your prayer request is too insignificant. God cares about you, and if it isn't insignificant to you, then it isn't insignificant to him.
I will start taking my medication today. I will take it for most of the next week, and then I will begin taking shots. I hate giving myself shots, but it goes with the territory. I've gotten used to it by now. Today is day three of my cycle, so days three through eleven I will be on medication. I will go back to the doctor Sunday the 14th for an ultrasound. That is part of taking these drugs. You have to be monitored constantly to make sure your ovaries aren't hyperstimulated. I will have to have my follicles measured and checked pretty regularly. This is when they will determine if I need more medication or an increased dosage.
I do have a few prayer requests for this week. First, I had blood work done Monday and Friday. My estrogen was too high Monday, so they tested it again Friday. Please pray that my estrogen is where it needs to be. Second, pray that this new medicine works really well and I won't have to increase my dosage and order more medicine. If they need to do that, I would love it if they would just give me some samples. They've done that before. It saves money. Also, please pray that the procedure works. I'm ready to have a baby. I get tired of doing these procedures, and I don't want to have to do IVF if I can help it.
For those of you who have contributed money or helped with our fundraising, I want you to know where your money has gone. So far, we've spent $1500 on this procedure. That isn't counting the other copays that we will pay or any extra medicine we may have to order. I am thankful that we didn't have to do IVF. That would've been even more money, but the fact is that ALL procedures are expensive. We are still fundraising and will continue to do so. We have one week to go on our Avon fundraiser, and we are doing another fundraiser this next week.
Thanks for your prayers and words of encouragement. I will continue to keep you posted. As always, here is the link to our fundraising site: http://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/our-journey-to-parenthood/50742.
Friday, June 21, 2013
Minor Setbacks
I've said it before, and I really mean it. I believe I'm having a baby. I completely believe in miracles. I absolutely believe to the core of my being that nothing is impossible with God. I believe that a doctor is not necessary for me to conceive. I wait every month to see if I'm pregnant, because I believe that I can naturally conceive a child. I don't care what doctors say. I'm under the care of the great physician, who is able to do more than we ask or imagine. So I let setbacks and frustrations roll off my back.
After a great doctor's appt. Monday, we got a couple of test results back that are frustrating. They tested my AMH, which they don't test until you are over the age of 35. It is a test that measures how many eggs they think you have. Well, anything under 1.0 means that your eggs are starting to deplete. My number was .44. It's not the end of the world. It's common for women as they age. It just means that I don't have as many eggs left. For the first time in my life, I feel old. Women in their forties oftentimes have numbers that are .1 or don't even measure, and they still conceive. It's just a small puzzle piece in the puzzle that is fertility. That test wasn't a big deal. It's expected as you age. It doesn't change anything.
However, we did another test called the CMV test. It's a common virus that women carry and never even know they have. You need to be positive or negative for the virus. It's really very difficult to explain. My test came back showing that I am currently infected with it. It looks to be changing over to positive but hasn't yet. They can't continue on with our treatments until they retest me. The test will be done in two weeks, which is July 5th. They have to get the results back before we can proceed. This may be too much information for you, but my period is supposed to start July 2nd. I have to go in and have my baselines and start my medicine around days 3-5. We will be cutting it really close. It could mean that we can't do the procedure in July and will have to wait until August. I don't want to do that. I was hoping to have time to do two, if needed, before school starts back.
It's a minor setback, but it's all good. God is in control. I just need prayer. The most amazing thing in the world would be for me to be pregnant and never even have to do the procedure. If not, then I need my period to be a few days late so that we can get the test results in. I need you all to pray. Thanks!
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
Game Plan
Yesterday was my doctor's appointment. It went better than I could have expected. He was very positive and wants to continue with what we did last summer. He isn't ready for IVF yet. That was great news because I was afraid he was going to look at my chart and results from last year and say that there is no point in continuing and that we should just go ahead with IVF. That would mean a wasted summer because we don't have enough money raised to do that yet.
In fact, he said my treatments last summer seemed to work very well, even though we didn't achieve a pregnancy. I was concerned that we might start seeing some issues because of my age, but he said that I was fine. He saw no reason for any concern with age at the moment. That is all great news to hear.
However, even though we aren't doing IVF yet doesn't mean we don't need to raise money. It cost over $4000 to do two rounds of treatments last summer. My insurance only pays 50% of fertility medication up to $2500. We have just about maxed that out. My doctor is working with us, and we are going to try two new medications this first round and see if they work. That should help with the cost a little.
We have only raised about $350, but that has already helped. Yesterday's copay would've been $100, but we had some credits, so it was knocked down to $89. That was a blessing. I'm just gonna do what I have to do to get pregnant and step out on faith. I know God is going to send the money. You never know. I could be pregnant right now and never even do the first procedure, or I could get pregnant with the first procedure and not have to worry about affording another. God is in control. I don't know when or how, but one thing is certain: I will have a baby.
I appreciate all of your prayers and support. If you are interested in helping with our fundraising, we are currently doing an Avon fundraiser. You can message me for details, and as always, here is our fundraising site: http://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/our-journey-to-parenthood/50742.
In fact, he said my treatments last summer seemed to work very well, even though we didn't achieve a pregnancy. I was concerned that we might start seeing some issues because of my age, but he said that I was fine. He saw no reason for any concern with age at the moment. That is all great news to hear.
However, even though we aren't doing IVF yet doesn't mean we don't need to raise money. It cost over $4000 to do two rounds of treatments last summer. My insurance only pays 50% of fertility medication up to $2500. We have just about maxed that out. My doctor is working with us, and we are going to try two new medications this first round and see if they work. That should help with the cost a little.
We have only raised about $350, but that has already helped. Yesterday's copay would've been $100, but we had some credits, so it was knocked down to $89. That was a blessing. I'm just gonna do what I have to do to get pregnant and step out on faith. I know God is going to send the money. You never know. I could be pregnant right now and never even do the first procedure, or I could get pregnant with the first procedure and not have to worry about affording another. God is in control. I don't know when or how, but one thing is certain: I will have a baby.
I appreciate all of your prayers and support. If you are interested in helping with our fundraising, we are currently doing an Avon fundraiser. You can message me for details, and as always, here is our fundraising site: http://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/our-journey-to-parenthood/50742.
Monday, May 20, 2013
Malachi 3:10
Well, we were hoping to get approved for the Compassionate Care Program, but we didn't. The letter came in the mail today. They said we make too much money. I really don't know how that is possible. I'm sure the bonus money I got from the AP grant program pushed us over the limits. Never mind the fact that I used every dime of that money to pay for treatments last summer. Oh, the irony! Needless to say, I'm a little down about it. They did say they'd give us a 10% discount, which doesn't help much when your medicine is in the thousands. Plus, our insurance is almost maxed out, but it will be okay. God will make a way. He always does.
Richard and I are constantly looking for jobs on the side to help with the cost. If I could just get a piano, I could start giving voice lessons again. Therein lies the problem. I don't have a piano, and they cost money. It will work out. I'll get a piano soon or a little job will come open. Richard and I tithe, and because of that, the Lord has blessed us. He will send us the money (Malachi 3:10). There are people out there who are struggling to put food on their tables, so I can't complain.
I talked to my sister Melanie today about doing an Avon fundraiser. We are going to get that together soon, and I will keep you all posted. If you have any fundraising ideas, just let me know. As always, I've attached the link to our fundraising page below. Continue to keep us in your prayers. Dealing with infertility is an emotional roller coaster ride. One day you're up, and the next day you are down.
http://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/our-journey-to-parenthood/50742
Richard and I are constantly looking for jobs on the side to help with the cost. If I could just get a piano, I could start giving voice lessons again. Therein lies the problem. I don't have a piano, and they cost money. It will work out. I'll get a piano soon or a little job will come open. Richard and I tithe, and because of that, the Lord has blessed us. He will send us the money (Malachi 3:10). There are people out there who are struggling to put food on their tables, so I can't complain.
I talked to my sister Melanie today about doing an Avon fundraiser. We are going to get that together soon, and I will keep you all posted. If you have any fundraising ideas, just let me know. As always, I've attached the link to our fundraising page below. Continue to keep us in your prayers. Dealing with infertility is an emotional roller coaster ride. One day you're up, and the next day you are down.
http://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/our-journey-to-parenthood/50742
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